Tuesday, December 28, 2010

ready to settle.

I am so sleepy tonight. Somehow after coffee and silly drinks and beer, my body is pliant, yet tense. A sensation of sore muscles, a pounding headache and loose limbs. The night is so quiet with occasional rain on a tin roof.

I wonder if you like me, as we sit over cheap beer at a wooden table. I wonder if I'm holding him back. In my quest to grow up, I still find myself (unsurprisingly) unsure. Children scare me, but deep down, I realize, if something were to happen, I'm not sure I could say no. I want to stop moving without reason. Moonlight shrouded in dark clouds. A peacefulness found in the silence.

Humming engines across the way, a chugging fullness in the dark. I forgot how to write.

You inspire stillness. Smoking and smiling in an empty room. We are encompassed by white walls and a lingering scent of onions, weed and the crisp night air. I am content in the glowing warmth of you. Conversation dissipates into the calm presence of two friends.

A thrill.


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